im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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