when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Randomize