I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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