I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
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Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
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No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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