At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
He is an equal opportunity slut.
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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