why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
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