Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
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can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
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Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
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