mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
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