still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
If I die, sorry about rent.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
there is glitter all over my balls
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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