Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize