PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
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