Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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