I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
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