haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Randomize