dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
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