At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
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