I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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