I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
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