Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
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I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
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THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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