suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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