420 ftw
I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
I just woke up to a lawnchair covered in lipstick. I'm wearing red lipstick. What happened and is the tequila?
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Randomize