he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Randomize