Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize