She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
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