His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
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If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
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