I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
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