3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
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