apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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