My friends, they love my intelligence
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Randomize