so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
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She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
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he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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