Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
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