Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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