do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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