I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
Randomize