Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
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