drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
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The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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