The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize