The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
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