I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize