I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
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