Don't you send me to vm
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
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