Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
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