so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
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My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
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cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
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