Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
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