So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
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