You're earring is so big in my mouth
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
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