pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
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