id be glad to
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
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