Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
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