That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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